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Great Frontier: A Poorly Researched Musical About Lewis And Clark (Original Cast Recording Live)

by Kevin Froleiks and Patrick J. Reilly

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1.
Overture 01:10
2.
In the sixteen something somethings, a ship came in from across the sea. The women and men called themselves puritans. And they believed God said they should wear belts on their heads. They invited us to dinner. To show they were friendly. We ate turkey and squash, a side of cranberry sauce. Dinner at Plymouth Rock and for dessert...small pox. And that's why we don't trust the white men. They fooled us once, but they won't fool us again. We won't fall for their tricks like we did in the sixteen something somethings. In the seventeen something somethings, revolution was in the air. We heard the Battle Hymn notes, from Minutemen and Red Coats. We knew whoever won that day, we were screwed anyway. The colonies won the battle. Celebration was in the air. And they made their presence known by kicking us out of our homes. They pushed us further west like we were some kind of pests. And that's why we don't trust the white men. They fooled us twice, but they won't fool us again. We won't fall for their tricks like we did in the seventeen something somethings. Now it's the eighteen something somethings. This is where our tale begins. Thomas Jeff-er-san just bought a bunch of new land. And it belongs to him, you see, 'cause Manifest Destiny. So I need you to remember, for me and for all my kin. SACAGAWEA AND NATIVE AMERICANS We're endangered today, no matter what teachers say. We were slaughtered with guns, But don't let that ruin your fun! Don't ever, ever, ever trust the white men. They'll fool you again and again and again. Don't fall for their tricks like we did in the eighteen something somethings. Seriously, Native Americans were almost completely wiped out. In the eighteen something somethings. Now that everyone's in such a great mood, let's start the show, which takes place... In the eighteen something somethings.
3.
Hello there, Mr. President. If I could have a brief moment. Hand to my creator, I wanna make this country greater. To be a bit more specific, I wanna go to the Pacific. I wanna explore and take inventory of all the western territories. So what do you say, sir? I'm ready to leave today, sir. I give you my solemn oath and vow! I promise that I'll make my country proud! My father told me this was, all just a waste of time 'cause I've never done a single thing of merit or worth mentioning. Maybe dad was right when he said greatness was never my destiny. Maybe I should leave and go back home... Great idea! Because you'll never make it out there all alone! Please let me first address, I'm sorry for my tardiness. Now I must implore that you let us go explore. There'll be quite a bit of commotion, when we reach the Pacific Ocean. Lewis and clark Mr. President, come on, what do you say? We'll do it for our Nation! There'll be cause for celebration! Out in the open air! Where I can fight a bear! Let us go and we can prove it! I know that we can do it! Together with my partner in crime! Thanks for listening, Mr. President. And thank you for your time.
4.
Just stay put, plant your foot, stay where you are. Don't go out, or wander about, no need to go far! When you travel and explore, you're worse off than you were before. So just stay put, just stay put, just stay put. Just shut up, and give up, before you start. There's no point, in blowing this joint, no need to depart! Exploring sea to shining sea, just makes more headaches for me. So just stay put, just stay put, just stay put. I'm sorry sir, but I just can't comprehend or understand how you can turn us down like this today. It's all a joke or a prank, I trust. You're obviously fooling us. I don't believe you mean these things you say! It's no joke, sorry folks, time to go. Don't delay, get on your way, end of the show! Even if you try, you'll just get halfway there and die. So just stay put, just stay put, just stay put. Don't be scared, to go out there, and explore. Don't be afraid, to promenade, to Pacific shores! And if things get a little dangerous, I know you'll be courag-e-ous. Good luck, now get out, and explore!
5.
Meriwether Lewis, I know that we can do this. Through thick and thin, and light and dark. As sure as your name's William Clark. Our journey's just beginning. Can't keep myself from grinning. Together you and me will venture out into the west. No river is too wide. No mountain is too high. Our western quest will best the rest of the other western quests. We'll journey everywhere it's for scientific merits. I know that I can do it with my best friend by my side. We'll be gone for three Septembers, but I need you to remember that someday we'll be heroes and our names be glorified! Off we go, to the unknown! I'm a little bit nervous, I confess. I think we've found our calling and although the sun is falling, our adventure is rising in the west! We're venturing out, where no man has gone. And we don't know what's lurking out there. There'll be wolves and lions and spiders and snakes And bears and bears and bears! But I'm not worried, not one little bit! We can do anything with my brains and your grit! There'll be monsters and lava and poisonous flies! And there's a good chance that we'll probably die! We're Lewis and Clark Clark and Lewis ...actually that doesn't sound right... We're Lewis and Clark! I promise you I mean this, nothing will come between us! 'Cause you're my best friend til the end so now let's disembark! Off we go, to the unknown! Let's hit the road, there is no need to digress. I think we've found our calling, and although the sun is falling, our adventure is rising in the west!
6.
Jefferson, you really amaze me. You're always finding new ways to be lazy. I'd heard rumors but I just had to see How you were tarnishing the office of the presidency. Now you gotta cut it out, stop being such a jerk. It's time to buckle down and start doing some work. I thought you would have grown up, but you're still just the same. If Washington were alive, he would be so ashamed. Settle down, John, 'cause last time I checked, I'm the president now, and I deserve your respect. Since you left this job has gotten so much harder. And it only gets harder when the country gets larger. Now you're making me angry and you're making me irate. Why don't we take off the gloves and have ourselves a debate? But think for a moment 'fore you step into the ring. You're just an ex-president, and I'm the next big thing! Who does he think he is? Who does he think he is? Coming into my house, talking like he's such a big man. An immature baby with a stupid idiotic plan. Is it so bad that I wanna relax? When you're the president you don't get to kick back! Who does he think he is? Talking to me like that. You must know you can't do this anymore. I've heard enough. Miss Secretary, please show Adams the door. Mr. President, how many times must I reiterate I'm not your secretary, I'm Secretary of State. I don't even know what that means. Good grief. It means if you and Burr get shot. He's Commander in Chief. I'm sorry, Madison, but I'm staying right hurr. And who would even try to shoot Aaron Burr? Yo! I'm Alexander Hamilton and I think we should get, all the states to come together and consolidate their debt! Well I guess I've said everything I needed to say. Good! Then see yourself out, and be on your merry way. Oh, just one last thing. What did you forget? While I'm here I might as well place a couple of bets. Fine. He can take your money. Hope you're ready to lose. We're betting where they're gonna die, let me know which state you choose. You can bet a couple dollars or more if you can spare. I bet a hundred bucks they make it all the way there.
7.
Me and You 01:31
Together, we'll follow the setting sun. Together, I know we can get this done. Together, we can have some fun. You've got me I've got you There's nothing side by side we can't do 'Cause you've got me And I've got you One and one is two This is often true, for me and you We've never been apart Together from the start If you start to fall I'll answer your call If you start to lag I'll give you a drag 'Cause it's me and you! It's Me It's Me and You and You And You And You And Me And Me And some day the world will see! That in the end, We're a couple of friends! We're two of a kind, To the finish line! Won't let each other slack, 'cause we've got each other's back! No matter what we face, You could never be replaced! 'Cause it's me and you!
8.
I claim this land for the United States If you could be on your way, that would be great. I claim the trees, the birds, and the flowers. You cannot claim what is already ours. If you want, we could still name you today. How many times must we tell you, we are Sha-sho-nay. Please leave us alone, I think that would be best. I’m sorry but our destiny is manifest. We’ve discovered a brand new America! But we already live in this Am-er-i-ca! What’s ours is yours and what’s yours is mine. Which means it all belongs to us, that’s the bottom line. Why do I feel so unaccomplished and blue? Because you didn't discover anything new! Is that why I don’t feel fulfilled? As explorers you are both completely unskilled. I killed a buffalo just to make this hat. You’re supposed to use every single part of that! Nature’s just a trail for me to blaze. If you fell off a cliff, I would be unphased. So how long have your people lived here again? Hundreds of years longer than any white men. So I guess we can't claim we found something new. Finally it seems I'm getting through to you. We were hoping to find a new America. But there's nothing new about Am-er-i-ca. Before you got here, our lives were just fine. Now it's time for you to leave, that's the bottom line. I hope we've made ourselves quite clear. Turn around and go home. Get out of here! You have no respect for the animals you hurt. Look another buffalo! I'm gonna make a shirt! Is there new land to discover anywhere? No I already have family living everywhere! Does the Southwest have any In-di-ans? Excuse me, sir, but we prefer Native Am-er-i-cans! What about the Northwest? We live there too! Or what about-- I promise you we live there too! Everything has been discovered, so just drop that notion. But what about the Pacific Ocean? I knew there had to be some new lands to find. Little Buddy, I hope this gives you piece of mind. I’ll make you a deal if it will get you to leave. What sort of plan do you have hidden up your sleeve? I’ll lead you to the Pacific if you leave us alone. I’ll guide you both through the great unknown. And I would also like to go. Just to keep this fool from killing every buffalo. Well let’s go and explore the new America! And then we'll kick them out of our Am-er-i-ca. We'll discover something new out at the coast line! Then we'll go our separate ways that's the bottom line!
9.
They say History is written by the winners It's always fathers expecting daughters to cook them dinners It can't be like that much longer This girl just got a bit stronger! I'm ready to join the story Show you 'round the territories I'll get you where you need to go There's just one thing you should know I'm making History Doing something greater Part of history so take that all you haters I'm in history And this is the story of me One day I'll see my name in lights Sacagawea, the great explorer Don't stop me, don't put up any fights don't look at me in horror I can't wait to see the day When crowds gather 'round me So important they will say And they'll write songs about me This is all that I could want I hear my destiny singing I'm a wildlife savant it's me that you are bringing So I think it's time we go The three of you and me lets get on with the show It's time I changed the key! I'm making History No longer in the background Part of history Us four are going westbound I'm in history And this is the story of me My story's just beginning I just can't stop this grinning I'll stay behind, just kidding Oh boy my head is spinning Because I'm making history I get to tell my story Part of history Can't wait to bask in glory I'm in history And some day, they'll tell The story of me!
10.
If there's one thing that I've learned in all my years! It's that Americans will always persevere! Though they may face a great adversity. Don't underestimate the strength of the American Dream! Well I think this bet has been won! Because Lewis and Clark are done! I mean it's not even fair, those two don't have a prayer! Adams it's been fun but get out! Take care! Our journey has officially begun! Can you smell that Pacific Ocean! I am leading the quest, I'm gonna get us out west! Sacagawea, hope to see ya, taking notes from the best! We're venturing out, with Clark in the lead. I don't know if I made the right choice. The fear of failure rings loud in my ears With the sound of my father's voice! It's me and you Don't need some girl telling us what to do! Who does he think he is? Am-er-i-ca! Just stay put! Who does he think he is? Am-er-i-ca! My doubts are rising in the west! Just stay put! Now it's only a matter of time! Before victory is mine, mine, mine! But first we'll take an intermission! Because we've reached the end of act one! That's right an intermission is due! So we'll see you right back here for act two!
11.
Entr'acte 00:56
12.
Now we're lost because of you! Because you had to do those stupid things you do! Mr. Bright Ideas! I tell you this is nothing new, So I must bid you adieu! We're lost And it's all because of you! No! No! We're lost because of you! You're the dreamer, you're the schemer and it's all because of you! You think you are so smart! Well I've got news for you! There's one thing I know is true! We are lost And it's all because of you! No, you! Yes, you! Screw you! We're lost, and we both know it's your fault! You got us lost, so the two of us are through. We were garbage men but now You're just garbage who somehow Got us lost! And it's all because of you! I feel like I'm drowning! My heart can't stop pounding! I find it astounding! Our friendship I'm doubting! Well then I say that it's Time to call it quits Because I've always been lost 'cause of you! Now we're lost because of you! Because you had to do those stupid things you do! Mr. Bright Ideas! I tell you this is nothing new, So I must bid you adieu! We're lost And it's all because of you! We're lost, and we both know it's your fault. You got us lost, so the two of us are through. We were garbage men but now You're just garbage who somehow got us lost! And it's all because of you! Fine. Fine. You're on your own!
13.
I’m not gonna say I told you so. It isn’t nice to gloat. I would never say I told you so, the very words get stuck in my throat. I’m not gonna say I told you so. Not to you, my dear old friend. I promise not to brag or boast, I won’t show off or condescend. I’m not gonna say I told you so, I don’t wanna patronize! No showing off or derisive scoff-- You haven’t won yet, you realize?
14.
There's no easy way. For me to say. The way you make me- I keep trying to find The words that rhyme To say hey... I... I'm discovering the way to speak to you I'm discovering the way to utter the phases I'm discovering it's hard, to just come out and say I want to be discovering you. I know it's uncalled for I know that it's crass That I want to discover all parts of your mass. I want you to want me I want you to want me to be Discovering me Discovering you I want to be discovering you. You are so beautiful That's easy to see But finding the words can be so hard for me I need to be with you, I want to be close I think this is coming off just a bit gross I'm discovering the way to speak to you I'm discovering the way to utter the phrases I'm discovering it's hard, to just come out and say I want to be discovering you. Why oh why is this hard Can't oh can't it be easy For me just to say-- I'm discovering the way to speak to you I'm discovering the way to utter the phases I'm discovering it's hard, to just come out and say I want to be discovering you. You want to be discovering me? I find it strange that men want me I mean it's strange for my age I guess that I'm saying, I'm glad that it's you Cause I want to discover you too! We're discovering the way to find the words. We're discovering the way to utter the phrases. We're discovering the way to speak to each other. I'm glad I'm discovering you.
15.
There's no easy way For me to say I think I might be-- I lose the words They come out like turds Can't I just say-- I'm discovering the way to be myself Discovering the way to open myself up I'm discovering the way to just be happy I'm discovering that I might be I'm discovering it's easy not to judge I'm seeing it's hard to just come out and say it Open the closet and let yourself out. Discover more about you. Since I was a boy, I felt different inside I knew that I wasn't the same Now I'm a man, and that boy still resides Shamefully deep in my soul Now it's time to come out of that hole It's time to open the doors I'm discovering the way to be myself I'm discovering the way to open myself up I'm discovering the way to just be happy I'm discovering that I am what I am!
16.
Out West! 00:53
Well... Hand in hand We'll show them we can Make it out west Came a long way But today's the day We make it out west Even though the road is rough We'll still show 'em we've got the stuff And now we're finally headed to the west! I'm sorry I got a bit nutty No problem, little buddy Now the four of us Explorius Are heading out--- WEST! Out West!
17.
We all know Columbus sailed the ocean blue Way back in fourteen...something something... But here's something you may not realize Leif Erikson was the first to arrive! Yet we celebrate Columbus for getting here first. And let me tell you something worse, When he washed up upon our beach He thought it was India he had reached. 'Cause Columbus was kind of an idiot, But we still shower him with praise. America honors an idiot, With a day off from work and parades. Yes Columbus was kind of an idiot who never found anything new. If America can love that idiot, Then they'll love the three of us too! We discovered we can do anything We totally proved my dad was wrong I made it out out west but not alone I discovered it with both of you! Our journey has just finished Our dreams were not diminished We made it out here We made it out west There's just one last thing that's vital Your book will need a title. A title with a catchy hook! I know what I will call my book... The Adventures of Lewis and Clark! Or Exploring with Lewis and Clark Or Tuesday's with Lewis and Clark Or Of Mice and Lewis and Clark Or Fahrenheit Lewis and Clark Or Breakfast of Lewis and Clark. Or Tropic of Lewis and Clark. Or As I Lay Lewis and Clark. Or The Talented Mr. Lewis and Clark. Or The Hitchhiker's Guide to Lewis and Clark. Or-- The Adventures of Lewis and Clark. You did it little buddy You made it all the way Hey not without you So what can I say Our Journey was long The adventure was rough But we were both strong Sacagawea was tough Who could forget the Adventures of Lewis and Clark Oh who could forget the Adventures of Lewis and Clark Please don't forget the Adventures of Lewis and Clark! The Adventures of Lewis and Clark and Sacagawea! Oh Yeah! Time for us to get off stage It's the scripts final page That's right, my friends We've reached the end So now you can go home!

about

Great Frontier is a musical farce about Lewis and Clark, two pathetic townies who have never done anything remarkable with their lives. But everything changes when President Jefferson sends them out west!

Will Lewis and Clark become American heroes, or will their powerful foes squash their American Dream? We actually have no idea. This show was very poorly researched.

Watch the full musical for free on YouTube: youtu.be/xEvPe_L2vOY?si=CSp6Yq9b2rxs3I55

credits

released November 5, 2017

Music and Lyrics by Kevin Froleiks and Patrick J. Reilly
Directed by Joe Harris
Piano by Chie Monoe

Meriwether Lewis - Kevin Froleiks
William Clark - Patrick J. Reilly
Sacagawea - Sara Tazari
Chief Running Joke - Tchaikovsky Santos
Thomas Jefferson - King Harrison
Aaron Burr - Levy Bru
James Madison - Maurice Licorish
John Adams - AJ Thompson

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Goodbye Charlemagne New York, New York

Failed comedian. Failing musician.

The artist currently known as Goodbye Charlemagne.

Guitars: Ricketts Parnassass

Keys: Dakota Boulevard

Bass: Dimo Rodrigo

Drums: Flora Lewpinsky

Additional instruments and vocals provided by Kevin Froleiks for tax purposes
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